Nothing Is Impossible.

Seduction patterns arise from a trauma that causes people to feel dead or empty inside.  The dead part in a person does not want to be dead or empty, but it does not know how to bring itself back to life (it doesn’t know meridian tapping techniques.)  It believes that the only way it can come back to life is if somebody outside of itself gives it what it needs to come back to life. We call these life and death requirements critical elements and they come in the form of gifts or benefits. 

In a seducee pattern, the person being seduced (seducee) attempts to get what he/she needs by accepting gifts/benefits or the promise of gifts/benefits from the seducer. The seducee pays for what he/she gets by allowing the seducer to drain him/her of positive qualities like energy, joy, and compassion.  In a seducer strategy, the person doing the seducing (seducer) tries to get what he/she needs by offering to provide the gifts/benefits (i.e. bribing) or by threatening or doing other manipulative behaviors. In effect, the promise from both seducer and seducee is, "I'll bring you to life with what I’m offering." 

Sadly, it is not really possible for someone outside of you to completely bring you to life. The most that anyone gets in a seduction pattern is a small amount of what the dead part needs, and it is insufficient, perverted, and unsatisfying. Both parties are hooked on the crumb of what they have gotten and the hope of more to come. Neither side can let go because the dead part is afraid that if it gives up what little it is getting it will go back to being completely dead which is unacceptable. You can usually tell if you’re seducing or someone is seducing you if you feel frustrated and drained after interacting with that person! 

How Do You Free Yourself of a Seduction Pattern?

The only way to free yourself of a seduction pattern is to give back and refuse to take (now or in the future) the gifts that you are tempted by, but the dead part can’t let go for fear that if it gives up what little it is getting it will go back to being completely dead. To clear seduction patterns, we use a prayer intervention in which you:

1. Renounce the gifts you’re trying to get (while feeling desperate not to),
2. Ask God/Divine Source (a source that can actually deliver) to free you from the seduction pattern, heal the dead part, and provide what you need.

The intervention works instantly regardless of attitudes toward or belief in God.

Results

After clearing this pattern, James, Monica, and Valerie felt freed of feelings of deep sorrow, worry, frustration, and guilt. With a feeling of deep patience they accepted that the other people were on their own journey, and turned their attention to taking better care of themselves.

Two days after James freed himself of his brother Samuel’s being impossible pattern, Samual actually called my office and booked two appointments. I successfully treated him for physical injury trauma to the brain. Six months later he had minor surgery to repair the residue from the injury.  The surgery was successful and he felt well taken care of by the doctor and his staff.

The week after Monica freed herself of her son Ed’s being impossible pattern, Ed did his own laundry (which he hadn’t done himself in 5 years), fed the dog and took him for a walk. He still hasn’t agreed to try any alternative treatments, but he stopped complaining about the pain in his gut.

In the month after Valerie freed herself of her partner Nancy’s being impossible pattern, Nancy found a new psychiatrist and started back on medication. She got laid off from the job she hated and happily decided to devote her time to losing weight, repairing her health, and starting her own business.

Freeing yourself from someone who is being impossible:

1. Write out the seducer strategy.

• “________ (name of the person who is being impossible) is being impossible in order to get… (list what he/she is trying to get by doing that) examples:  attention, care, revenge, love, power, fame, freedom from responsibility 
  And if I could just _________ (fix them, heal them, give them what they need, take care of her properly, etc.) I would get … (list what you are trying to get by doing that): examples: redemption, freedom from guilt, love, admiration, peace of mind, worship, happiness

1. Locate in your body where you feel desperate for these benefits. 
2. Say the prayer:

"I renounce this strategy (read what you wrote in step 1)

and I pray God to free me from _________ (the person who is being impossible) and everyone I do this with, and I pray God to heal all parts of myself, associated parts, dissociated parts, disowned, disowning, and autonomous parts. I pray God to free me from this seduction pattern, because that’s all it is, and I pray God to free me from this whole pattern and everything that made me susceptible to it. I pray God to heal us of all the damage I’ve ever done and all the stress I’ve ever caused myself and others while under the influence of this pattern and erase it so completely it’s as if it never happened. I pray God to provide us with whatever else we need in the benefits areas.”

1. Now that you’ve said the prayer, notice that the feelings of deep sorrow and guilt are gone. Since you are no longer desperate for the promised benefits, know that you’ll be able to figure out how to get what you need in a straightforward way.
2. Use this prayer on any other seducer strategy that you may be running.

For help clearing this and other dysfunctional family system patterns, call 781-444-6940 or email [email protected] to book an appointment. To treat another common seducer strategy, purchase https://www.hblu.org/product/Exchange-Your-Inner-Critic-for-Compassion.